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Got Beets?

alec vanderboom


Mimi is holding up my find at the Farmer's Market during my trip with Claire, fresh beets. I listened to 3 seperate people rave about roasted beets with rosmary. Having only had those gross purple beets from a can, I thought they were exaggerating their claims. Yet having eating roasted fresh beets was incredible. It really reminded me forcefully how much I adore the "Farm to Table" movement. Great cooking is simple if I start with fresh, local food. Hurrah for the West Virginian Farmer!
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I love being Catholic! It's so practical!

alec vanderboom

I just got off the phone with a beloved priest from my old parish. Father Doug walks the streets in Washington DC offering free mental health to the homeless. He was calling to check in with my family because he loves us. (He put Tessy's picture in his prayer book and prayed for her every day after the NICU) I told him about an incident in my neighborhood that made me fearful to be walking alone in the early morning. Father Doug tells me "Oh, I've got just the thing for that!"

I totally expected Father Doug to give me a sugary prayer to my Guardian Angel. Instead he gives me this completely secular trick to get out of sticky situations-- make a fake call on my cell phone. He said "I've been in scary situations in Downtown DC, and I've excused myself very gently "Excuse me, I need to take this call." Then he walks away. He says no one ever bothers him. He says the cellphone acts "like a light" that scares the bad guys away. It was so different from the speech I expected to get, the contrast made me laugh!

I really enjoy talking about my little daily troubles with good Catholic priests. I've got so much great advice from very wise and kind men. There are so many great men who are interested in protecting me, guiding me, and encouraging me in this spiritual walk. My new friend Heidi said that after coming back from a great Adoration session she thought "Why doesn't everyone want to become Catholic?" That's how I feel after every funny/real/loving conversation I have with a priest. "Hey, they are handing out free adoptive Dads who adore you over here! Who wouldn't want to become a Catholic?"

TERRA NOVA (A Pro-Life TV Show)

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I'm not a usual Sci-Fi fan, but this TV series, which is new on Netflix, is totally thrilling. In the year 2159, a "family is four." A couple is not allowed to have more than two children. A tough Chicago cop and his doctor wife, defy the population rules and have a third child. They are caught and the Dad is put into jail. He escapes from prison to rejoin the family as they emigrate to a new colony "Terra Nova."

Through some kind of space/time wormhole thing, the colony is actually in the past--during the Dinosaur times. It's like Jurassic Park meets Lost meets Sci Fi thriller. There is tons of entertainment stuff for the whole family. (Note there are scenes of dinosaurs eating people which somehow doesn't freak out my 6 year old who is usually scared of everything--I guess because dinosaurs don't exist now? So please preview this show yourself before sharing with young kids).

My favorite thing is the writing. There are these beautiful lines of dialogue about deep inner truths of family life that sort of float up above all the chaotic dinosaur chasing scenes. Because Sci-Fi such an unfamiliar genre for me, I see the similarities to my own life with such clarity. I walk away from watching this TV show really feeling strengthen in my vocation of marriage.

Send me an email if you are a fan of this show too!

Homeschooling On the Cheap

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Over the past five years, necessity is the mother of invention. Here is my usual supply list for homeschooling three kids in elementary school: pencil, paper, library card, and the internet. Most of what I teach is straight out of my own head. Here's how I do it.

1. Topical Conversations at Dinner

One night after watching Downton Abbey, I got convinced we could have elevated dinner conversations. Considering my oldest kid was 9 and my fifth kid was1, and there was lots of  "keep your knees off the table" comments (my son and toddler are strange contortionists who belong at Cirque du Soleil), my husband had his doubts. Yet we persisted. Now this is a highlight of the day.

My husband is a science guy. He's also the more quiet parent. Now my husband uses the "dinner topic time" to hold court in his home and share with us all the brilliant stuff inside his head. Sometimes he explains to us the details of how blood clots. Sometimes is the use of those new 3 D printers. Last night it was the photosynthesis process that lets cabbages stay alive long after they are cut from their roots. It's like a college science class condensed into a 20 minute segment.

Jon gives a lot of details in his conversations. Sometimes I worry "this is way over their head." Yet my kids drink in every word. There is something about sitting in a dining room chair and eating that makes information go straight into their brains. It's way better than lecturing at a chalk board. (In fact, teaching while my kids are imprisoned, I mean focused, at dinner is my favorite time to teach Catechism for the same reason).

(Oh and the kids are allowed to propose dinner topics too. Sometimes they are super fun. Other times it's a chance to explain how dinner topics, unlike chatting with a single friend, need to be of general interest to a group of people--which I think is a really important social skill).

2.   Teach Around Your Kids Strengths

My kids love to play video games. Their favorite obsession right now is a free internet game site called Roblox.http://www.roblox.com  This is an international sight where kids build their own video games for others kids to play. It's all live action. It takes some parental policing. For example, our rule is "No Zombie Games". There are sort of violent slasher video games that I won't want my young kids playing. But there are plenty of fun games that are totally G rated.

I use my son's obsession with Roblox to help his reading and writing skills. We do spellings lists based on words he wants to learn. For example, one list was "Sword", "Ax" and "Fire." Then I help him write sentences that he can use on Roblox. The difference between teaching my son fun "boy words" and teaching him words from a spelling word book are huge!  He is a kid who actually loves to do homework now.

Now, sometime in the Fall, I'm going to buy a third grade spelling book for him--so that we can better master basic spelling rules. (My technique is a little too random I think to really master spelling). But my idea is that teaching from a set word list is a supplement to their regular spelling work. Not the main lesson.

My kids are opinionated. They know what they want to say. I help give them correct spelling so that they can write down their ideas for someone else to read. This has really opened up reading and writing and spelling to us. I struggled for years to help them learn how to "decode." They really had no interest in it. Now that I'm starting with "encoding" they eat it up. The plus that once they know how to spell a word, they can read it AND write it at the same time.

Now that we have a passion, Roblox, I'm building a curriculum around that. My son and I are starting a technical writing book to write down tips for his friends who are new to the game. We're also researching what a "video game designer does". I'm hoping to get us into meet some game designers at our local college.

I feel like my job as his teacher is to take his interests seriously and expand them.  When I work with his interests, instead of against them (or worse, judging that playing video games isn't a good use of his time) we can get so much farther in the subjects the State require me to teach--Reading, Writing, Math, etc.

3. One Big Idea Each Day

The big change I made this summer, is to balance out all this freedom and autonomy with student lead learning to teaching "One Big Idea" each day. I see myself feeding my kids minds with something new, big, and nutritious. I teach it in the morning, so they can chew on it all day long.

I usually go to the library and pick up cool new books for this purpose. Right now, we're reading "Into the Unknown: How Great Explorers Found Their Way by Land, Sea and Air" by Stewart Ross. This book is awesome! It goes from Leif Erickson to the Apollo 11 mission. There are all unfolding interesting maps and cross sections that my kids drool over. (The Illustrator, Stephen Biesty did an amazing job). I read a chapter a day. I quiz them orally on the next day. This stuff just sticks like cotton candy to my kid's brains. I can't believe my 6 year old can spell "the Silk Road" and now knows where Marco Polo traveled.

***

Our summer homeschooling schedule is light and refreshing and easy to do. My rule is that they have to finish their homework each weekday before turning on the computer. That's 20 minutes of reading homework, which earns points for our library's summer reading program). Fun spelling words. One big idea each day. They complain that they are the only kids who have to work in the summer. Yet, I like that keeping up a routine in the summer helps us transition easily into 1st, 3rd, and 5th grade in the Fall.

(This approach isn't doing Math yet because my kids are really good in the subject. In the Fall, I'll work more systematically on Math and English Grammer).

Clothes Line Thoughts

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This is week eight of having no working dryer. Eight weeks of hanging clothes to dry outside on the clothes line. I passed through the honeymoon phase of clothes lines. The last five days were rough. We had a hurricane pass through our town, which meant five days of solidly raining weather. Everyone ran out of clean clothes. Jon went to work today in an Orange Polo Shirt and causal day isn't until Friday.

Even before the mighty rain fest, things were getting rough. A bird pooped on my husband's work pants while they dried. I kept bringing in random bugs and spiders with the clean wash. I forgot to bring clothes in before a rain storm and watch while a half day's worth of work went south in a 15 minute shower. I started to think "Yeah, this is why no one does this anymore. It totally sucks to be poor."

Monday came and it was grey and dreary. I couldn't do "Wash on Monday" for the first time since I started my little chore cycle five years ago. Instead of feeling mad, I felt a little happy. It was a free vacation day. (I wash dirty clothes every day as a Mom in a family of 7, but Monday is my "major laundry day for all the sheets, etc.). I felt like I was playing hooky from work all day. It was a little cool to have the laundry tied to an outside variable factor (the weather) instead of a steady routine each and every week.

This morning turned into a gorgeous Summer Day. I was out at 9 AM hanging up my husband's oxford shirts. I took the baby outside with me. She played in our non-charged toy jeep. She was silent in our joy at getting to climb on the "big kid stuff" without interruption. The sun was shining. The birds were chipping. I pinned laundry on the line with these cheap wooden clothes pins that are already starting to get rough and moldy after 6 weeks outside. (That's why people pay more for plastic? Or are diligent about taking them off the line each time?)

It hits me that it's so nice to be outside. Loafing around. That as a Mom I so rarely get a chance to be outside listening to the birds. It's rest for my ears.

I'm usually doing laundry inside a dark basement. Trying to rush through the task of filing  wet clothes from the washer to the dryer as fast as possible. I'm eager to get onto something "more exciting" in my day.

But hanging out wet wash on a sunny day is fun. Simple work keeps my mind free. It's restful to pin wet clothes to a clothes line on a nice day.

So much of my approach to housekeeping is "rushing through the mundane stuff to get to the good stuff." It's shocking to find that sometimes housework "is the good stuff." Thank you God for my broken dryer!

Rodney Atkins - Farmer's Daughter (official video)

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I'm in LOVE with this song. Now that I'm a Catholic, the Lord has me doing some stupidly hard work. Some afternoons I'm so grumpy and I think "Seriously, Lord?" Then it just takes one glimpse of heaven, maybe from my husband's smile at dinner, or maybe its a quiet moment of inspiration in my heart and all that hard work seems totally worth it. I go from grumpy to thinking "I love my job!"

On Being Weird, Part 2

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I found being  on a relaxing vacation very stressful. Weird, no? There was a moment at 3 PM on Saturday, after a full 24 hours of being off "Mom Duty" that I begged my husband to take me home. We were sitting on this old fashion Titanic Like wicker chaise lounges waiting to be called for afternoon tea. I saw a young family eating in the courtyard in front of us. Suddenly this longing came up in me. It wasn't so much missing a specific kid. I missed having something to do.

I'm usually complaining about that part of motherhood. There is always something to do. Someone needs a sippy cup or a diaper change or urgently needs help spelling the word nemesis. It's impossible for me to have a conversation on the phone with a friend, or write a blog post, or kiss my husband without some urgent call for help. I spend most of my day lightly aggravated that I don't get to self-determine my day.

Yet in that peaceful hotel last weekend, it suddenly felt oppressive to not have anything to do. I sort of panicked. Who am I if I don't have somebody's lunch meat to cut up?

After I babbled about my strange feelings, my husband gently grabbed my hand and said "you need this vacation as much as I do."

Now that I'm back home, I'm trying the radical concept of "downtime." I realize that there was an adage "nap when the baby naps." Now that I have multiple kids, I don't nap with the teething baby naps. I do the things that are hard to do while the active baby is awake. I homeschool. I catch up on laundry. I make bread. I'm up during the night with the baby and I'm up during the day with the rest of the kids.

Moreover, sleeping doesn't really count as "downtime" anyway. If I go to sleep stressed, then chances are I wake up stressed. What I realized in that unfamiliar time over vacation is that downtime is more about sitting still and doing nothing. This book I'm reading advocates downtime for "one hour a day, one day a week, one week every 16 weeks." That seems a very ambitious goal for me. Yet, I'm game for it.

On Being a Weird and Wonderful

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I have a severe block about housework. Part of is that I didn't learn how to do housework as a kid. Part of is that a recovering intellectual snob, I saw these tasks as somehow "lesser work." Yet a bigger part is that housework is plain hard for me. I'm messy. I'm creative. I've got these ADD tendencies. It's really hard to stay focused on the job I initially set out to do without remembering with urgency all these other tasks that also need to be done.

I read Fly Lady. I felt horrible about myself when I read her website, and she's supposed to be the "encouraging" housekeeping lady.

I've had trouble finding "beginning housekeeping books." When I started cooking, I could find "beginner cookbooks." I could find cookbooks that assumed nothing. I need instructions on how to hard boil eggs. I found easy to use recipes at Safeway.com. I also found delightful kid cookbooks while I was cooking with my middle daughter Maria. I'm gradually working myself to "chef". Cooking has gone from a dreaded chore to an interesting challenge most days.

Meanwhile, my housekeeping journey feels stuck in molasses. There are so many layers of problems. I think I got mostly over the "this is beneath my dignity" attitude problem. It helped to learn about the saints. Mother Teresa scrubbed her own toilets. Teresa of Avila said "God exists among the pots and pans." It's hard to argue against the spiritual value of housekeeping with such holy examples in front of me.

Now I'm really how hard housekeeping is because of my inner demons. I'm a perfectionist. I drive myself crazy because my work is never "good enough." I hear these critical voices in my head. "You call that clean?" "You're kids are living in filth." I just want to run away and hide my head in a good book.

Crazy as it sounds (this is my weird and wonderful tagline which I stole from my awesome writer friend, Rebecca Frech) I'm finding a weird way around my hangups. I'm connecting with my inner historian.

I love Downton Abbey. I'm reading all about the servant class in Edwardian England. I'm learning all about the different jobs and absurd rituals of housekeeping in Victorian England. All of this information is helping me stay focused! This morning, there were a dozen things for me to do. I could mentally label the roles. "Now I'm the cook making bread." "Now I'm the valet when I'm sewing on a button." Being an actress staying in character is helping me learn the art of task completion.

The baby woke up crying at 6 AM while I was busy sewing buttons back onto my son's First Communion blazer. I got that familiar drop in my stomach. "She's up early. Now I'll never get this project finished." It's had been 6 months since my son lost both buttons on his blazer, who knows when I'd get a quiet moment to finish this task.

What was weird and wonderful about this morning was that hearing the baby cry, I thought "Ugh, time to be a nursemaid." But then I thought "wait, this is a big deal. I've got to finish the valet work and let the baby cry for a moment." Because I'm weird I thought "Let the nursemaid get to the baby, I need to finish my sewing work."

I know I'm weird. I'm home alone with 5 children for 14 hours a day and I've started talking about myself in the third person.

I'm so happy to find my own weird way to stay on track with five children in my house. I've got a lot of responsibilities that overlap and often seem to come bearing down on me at once. It's so cool to have this "Victorian Servant Model" to help me organize all the different pieces of my homelife. I'm starting to find my inner rhythm by being a historical geek.

Living the Carmelite Life While Traveling

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This is so funny, I had to share. So we had a $150 gift card for food included in our free hotel stay. That's almost 2 weeks of groceries for my family of 7. So when I booked this trip during a "lean month" financially, I thought we'd be okay. Right before our trip, I looked at the dinning menu. $50 per dinner entree! Because this is a nice resort, right? I totally freaked out about food. I didn't have any extra money to cover our food costs during this trip. I worried about it for 2 weeks. But God had my back.

My husband and I decided we'd use the gift card to have one nice meal in the hotel dining room without worrying about the cost. Then we ate oatmeal and granola bars for the rest of the weekend. It was so fun. My big romantic idea was having an indoor picnic for $9 with canned salmon, cream cheese, discounted rye bread, a small bag of pistachios. Poverty means creativity. Life as a Carmelite is fun!
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So much more relaxed by Day 2!

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This is us before we left for Mass on Saturday. I'm only a Catholic because of my husband Jon. I almost started crying in the pew while I gave a prayer of Thanksgiving for my marriage on Saturday night. Sharing the same religion as your spouse is an awesome thing!
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Site of our Anniversary Dinner

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We had the BEST meal here on Friday night. The food was awesome. Afterwards, Jon told me "Why did I enjoy that so much. I ate so slowly. Why don't I usually eat like this?" I started laughing. I'm said "It's the first meal we've had without a toddler at our table. Of course it felt like a surreal experience!"
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